Understanding Korean: When to Speak Polite-존댓말[jon-daen-mal] or Casual-반말[ban-mal]

In Korean, how you say something matters just as much as what you say. 

Let’s break down the two ways Koreans speak: polite-존댓말[jon-daen-mal] and casual-반말[ban-mal].

 

Gwanghwamun Square with the statue of King Sejong, creator of Hangeul

 

 

1. What is 존댓말 (Polite Speech)?
• 존댓말 [jondaenmal] is the polite and respectful way to speak.
• You use it when talking to:
 Older people
 Strangers
 Teachers
 Your boss or colleagues (unless very close)
• It’s safer to always start with 존댓말 until someone tells you to relax.

Examples:
• Hello - 안녕하세요 [Annyeonghaseyo]- 존댓말 [jondaenmal]

              /안녕[ Annyeong]- 반말[ban-mal]

• Thank you - 감사합니다 [Gamsahamnida]- 존댓말 [jondaenmal]

                      /고마워[gomawo]- 반말[ban-mal]

• Where is the bathroom? - 화장실 어디예요?[Hwajangsil eodieyo?]- 존댓말 [jondaenmal]
                                            /화장실 어디야?[Hwajangsil eodiya?]- 반말[ban-mal]

2. What is 반말 (Casual Speech)?
• 반말 [banmal] is the casual, informal way of speaking.
• You use it with:
Close friends
Younger people
Family members
• It feels friendly but can be rude if used too soon with strangers!

3. When to Switch?
• Always start with 존댓말.
• If someone says:
“말 편하게 해도 돼요” [Mal pyeonhage haedo dwaeyo] — “You can speak casually”
→ Then you can switch to 반말.
• Otherwise, better to keep using 존댓말 to be safe and respectful.

 

4. Quick Tips
• Ordering at a restaurant → 존댓말
• Talking to your Airbnb host → 존댓말 
• Chatting with a younger local at a bar (after some drinks)?
→ Maybe 반말, if they allow it!
• Asking for directions → 존댓말
• Talking with kids → 반말 (but polite tone still helps!)

 

5. Survival Phrases
• Please speak slowly - 천천히 말해 주세요[Cheoncheonhi malhae juseyo]- 존댓말

                                      /천천히 말해줘[Cheoncheonhi malhae juo]- 반말

• What’s your name? - 이름이 뭐예요? [Ireumi mwoyeyo?]- 존댓말
                                    /이름이 뭐야? [Ireumi mwoya?]- 반말

 

Final Tip:
Koreans love it when you try to be polite.
Even if you make small mistakes, your effort to show respect will be noticed and appreciated!